The Top 10 Most Aggravating Facebook Posts
This blog entry is dedicated to the most aggravating types of Facebook posts out there.
With such a noble category as this, there were literally hundreds of posts that could have made the list. As a result, it was very difficult to narrow down the list to just ten items. I'm sorry to all of the highly qualified posts who had to be rejected, but we had to draw the line somewhere. After all, one of the most aggravating types of posts is a ridiculously long numbered list! For example, "The Top 85 Kevin Bacon Movies You've Never Seen!" A list of 85 Kevin Bacon movies? Ain't nobody got time for dat!
One of the things that makes these types of posts so aggravating is that part of you really wants to read them; it's that part of you that also wants to binge watch the last season of Psych this weekend. At the same time, there is another part of you that really wants to learn how to hack into the Facebook database just so you can permanently delete all these posts in one fell swoop.
These are the posts that you love to hate, and yet you hate the fact that you love them!
So, without further ado, I present the top 10 most aggravating Facebook posts.
10) Top 40 things people do (in some aspect of life) better than you!
Ever been curious why the neighbors' kids are so much more well-behaved than your kids? Always wondered why your friends are so much more likable than you? Well, look no further. Facebook has the all the platitudes you'll ever need to answer all of these difficult life questions. And it's usually presented in an easy-to-read list. How awesome is that! The answer to life, the mysteries of the universe, and everything? 42!
9) Best/worst cities to live in
Do I really need a Facebook post to tell me that Detroit looks like a post-apocalyptic warzone?
8) Things only a 'such-and-such type of person' would understand
Tall people, short people, BYU people, beard-growing people. Yes, we are all different; but lets' try to learn more about how we are all the same. We want to be united, not divided.
7) Worst family photos
These are hilarious, but I always feel a tinge of guilt afterwards for laughing at those poor kids.
6) Animal stuff
I have a love/hate relationship here, no doubt.
5) Life hacks
These posts are awesome; but who is ever going to face a situation where they need to know how to attach a paper clip to some jelly beans in order to create a MacGyver like Wi-Fi booster?
I guess I'll be late for work, but at least I know how to hard-boil an egg in the microwave.
4) Blog posts
Never before have so many people with so little to say said so much to so few!
"No one cares about your commentaries on Isaiah, Mike."
'Nough said!
3) What kind of 'such-and-such' are you?
All my life, my soul has been troubled, like the ocean during a storm. Peace was nowhere to be found. Why? Because I've always wondered what type of Marvel Superhero I would be. Sure, I could try to guess what superhero would suit me best, but it would be just that—a guess. I've never had access to a comprehensive, licensed, accredited, official exam that could properly diagnose my superhero type. Until now! Finally, I can say without reservation, with complete confidence... (dark and menacing voice) "I'm Batman."
2) What is your magic goofy elf name?
Hey, it's a legitimate question. What if I find myself at the gates of Mordor and the gatekeeper asks me, "What... is your favorite color? What... is your magic goofy elf name?"
And the number one most aggravating type of Facebook post is... (drum roll please...)
1) Game updates/invites
Just, no. Just, stop.
The worst part is, we've all played a fun app on our iPhone that started posting updates to our Facebook feed without us knowing. Boy, do I look stupid now that everyone knows I played that silly "Perry the Platypus" game during work!
Conclusion
The danger in a post like this is that it only adds to the minutia of trivia garbage that is destroying your Facebook feed. Just like Attila the Hun would lay waste to the countries he invaded, I have just utterly wasted your Facebook feed with this pointless post. But if you still feel that I haven't wasted enough of your time, feel free to check out my next humor-based post >>> or my <<< previous humor-based post.
With such a noble category as this, there were literally hundreds of posts that could have made the list. As a result, it was very difficult to narrow down the list to just ten items. I'm sorry to all of the highly qualified posts who had to be rejected, but we had to draw the line somewhere. After all, one of the most aggravating types of posts is a ridiculously long numbered list! For example, "The Top 85 Kevin Bacon Movies You've Never Seen!" A list of 85 Kevin Bacon movies? Ain't nobody got time for dat!
One of the things that makes these types of posts so aggravating is that part of you really wants to read them; it's that part of you that also wants to binge watch the last season of Psych this weekend. At the same time, there is another part of you that really wants to learn how to hack into the Facebook database just so you can permanently delete all these posts in one fell swoop.
These are the posts that you love to hate, and yet you hate the fact that you love them!
So, without further ado, I present the top 10 most aggravating Facebook posts.
10) Top 40 things people do (in some aspect of life) better than you!
Ever been curious why the neighbors' kids are so much more well-behaved than your kids? Always wondered why your friends are so much more likable than you? Well, look no further. Facebook has the all the platitudes you'll ever need to answer all of these difficult life questions. And it's usually presented in an easy-to-read list. How awesome is that! The answer to life, the mysteries of the universe, and everything? 42!
9) Best/worst cities to live in
Do I really need a Facebook post to tell me that Detroit looks like a post-apocalyptic warzone?
8) Things only a 'such-and-such type of person' would understand
Tall people, short people, BYU people, beard-growing people. Yes, we are all different; but lets' try to learn more about how we are all the same. We want to be united, not divided.
7) Worst family photos
These are hilarious, but I always feel a tinge of guilt afterwards for laughing at those poor kids.
6) Animal stuff
I have a love/hate relationship here, no doubt.
5) Life hacks
These posts are awesome; but who is ever going to face a situation where they need to know how to attach a paper clip to some jelly beans in order to create a MacGyver like Wi-Fi booster?
I guess I'll be late for work, but at least I know how to hard-boil an egg in the microwave.
4) Blog posts
Never before have so many people with so little to say said so much to so few!
"No one cares about your commentaries on Isaiah, Mike."
'Nough said!
3) What kind of 'such-and-such' are you?
All my life, my soul has been troubled, like the ocean during a storm. Peace was nowhere to be found. Why? Because I've always wondered what type of Marvel Superhero I would be. Sure, I could try to guess what superhero would suit me best, but it would be just that—a guess. I've never had access to a comprehensive, licensed, accredited, official exam that could properly diagnose my superhero type. Until now! Finally, I can say without reservation, with complete confidence... (dark and menacing voice) "I'm Batman."
2) What is your magic goofy elf name?
Hey, it's a legitimate question. What if I find myself at the gates of Mordor and the gatekeeper asks me, "What... is your favorite color? What... is your magic goofy elf name?"
And the number one most aggravating type of Facebook post is... (drum roll please...)
1) Game updates/invites
Just, no. Just, stop.
The worst part is, we've all played a fun app on our iPhone that started posting updates to our Facebook feed without us knowing. Boy, do I look stupid now that everyone knows I played that silly "Perry the Platypus" game during work!
Conclusion
The danger in a post like this is that it only adds to the minutia of trivia garbage that is destroying your Facebook feed. Just like Attila the Hun would lay waste to the countries he invaded, I have just utterly wasted your Facebook feed with this pointless post. But if you still feel that I haven't wasted enough of your time, feel free to check out my next humor-based post >>> or my <<< previous humor-based post.
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