Anxiety

Let me start with three different concepts:

1) "The path of your life will largely be determined by how well you seek and receive spiritual promptings from the Lord."

2) "It is important to pray for what the Lord wants you to pray for."

3) "There are so very many blessings the Lord wants us to have that we are completely missing out on."

What do all of these concepts have in common? For the purposes of this blog post, the common thread is this: all three concepts are very likely to evoke some level of anxiety in those who read it.

The brain is a strange thing at times. It is an extremely powerful tool, and it wields such a strong influence on us. It is basically our entire stream of consciousness. But the brain can play tricks on us. If we are not careful, it can end up being nothing more than an emotional torture device that plays out all sorts of awful scenarios of what the future might hold, with 99% of those scenarios never happening.

Up until a few years ago, I lived in denial (no, not the river in Egypt)! I told myself that anxiety was a clinical mental problem that should be feared. I denied any type of anxiety I felt, and I told myself I wasn't "that type of person". Looking back on it, it seems like such a strange and silly thing to do. Anxiety is a human emotion, just like fear or love or happiness. Am I going to live in denial about those emotions too? Of course not. So why live in denial about anxiety?

Everyone experiences anxiety. There are no exceptions. It is natural and normal. But if we give into the stigmas of anxiety, this prevents us from facing and fixing the small problems it causing. And this of course leads to bigger problems. Anxiety doesn’t just solve itself.

So, how do we address normal levels of anxiety so they do not become problematic levels of anxiety? Everyone must learn the techniques that work for them, but here are a few things that work for me.

Voice Out All Of Your Fears

Write them down if you have to. And don't hold anything back. Identify exactly what is causing your fear/anxiety. And then write out the absolute worst-case scenario, the mid-case scenario, and the best-case scenario.

Example: should I marry so-and-so? Worst-case scenario: it is an absolutely terrible marriage and I end up needing to get divorced. Mid-case scenario: it is a totally normal marriage with its ups and downs; it has lots of happiness and wonderful memories; and it has the normal levels of challenges and difficulties. Best-case scenario: the marriage is everything I would hope for, and we are extremely happy together.

Face All Of The Fears You Voiced Out

Can you overcome the worst-case scenario, if it ended up happening? Of course you can. You've done so many hard things in life. You've overcome so many challenges. You could overcome the worst-case scenario if you had to. But then think of how wonderful even the mid-case scenario could be, to say nothing of the best-case scenario.

Recognize That Almost All Of Those Imagined Scenarios Will Never Happen

Now that you've voiced out all those torturous thoughts your brain has been having, it is easy to see how extremely unlikely the worst-case scenario is. As I said before, 99% of the scenarios our brain imagines never even come close to happening.

Be OK With Any Outcome

Once you have your worst, mid, and best-case scenarios laid out, learn to be ok with any of those scenarios happening. Count your blessings. Think of all the other wonderful things life will offer outside of this current fear you are facing.

Recognize How Many Negative Things You Are Thinking

As I said before, if we are not careful, the brain becomes an emotional torture device for us that plays out our worst and most irrational fears. I read an article recently that said that 70-75% of all thoughts we think are negative. Be more positive.

Be Positive

Be more positive about yourself. Be more positive about others. Be more positive about the future. Be more positive about the good that will come from your efforts.

Give Yourself More Credit

Recognize how good you are doing in life. Recognize all the good things you are accomplishing. Recognize how well you have done in facing your fears and anxieties in the past. Recognize how often life has turned out well for you.

Recognize When Your Brain Is Torturing You

Try to identify when your brain is going into a negative spiral. Create techniques for kicking it out of that spiral, and into a good spiral. Recognize that things never have been and never will be as bad as your mind is making them out to be.

Pray For Assurances That Everything Will Be Alright

When you feel the Spirit telling you everything will be OK, this will calm your fears and help you face your anxiety, because you know everything will turn out OK.

Recognize You Are Not Messing Up God's Plan for You

There was an excellent article in the Ensign recently about this. Whenever you feel anxiety creeping up in your mind, say these words: "I'm not messing up God's plan for me."

Recognize That, Excluding Revelation, It Is Impossible To Know How Things Would Have/Will Turn Out

Once you have made your decision and gone down a path long enough, it is impossible to know how the alternative path would have gone. Your brain will try to tell you the other choice would have been better. But there is absolutely no way to know if that is true. It is simply impossible to know. You must choose to have faith and more forward without regret.

Recognize When Your Expectations Are Too High

Some of us set such high expectations for ourselves and for the good things that life should give us, that we make it impossible to not be disappointed and to not have anxiety. We worry about achieving impossibly high levels of ease and happiness in life. Such a life of ease and ‘only good things’ was never meant to be.

Conclusion

As I have implemented these techniques over the past few years, my levels of happiness and contentment and satisfaction in life have skyrocketed. People have told me that I'm too happy, and that they think I have lived a charmed life because of my happiness levels. Find the techniques that work for you. Look to God and live.

Thanks for reading.

P.S.

As an example of voicing out my fears, I was recently worried about if I would be able to go backpacking enough this summer. What a silly thing to worry about. But it took me writing down the fear to see how silly it was to worry about. And it took me writing down the worst, mid, and best case scenarios to fully realize that everything was going to be OK (more than OK) in regards to this fear. I'd be able to get plenty of backpacking in this season. But it took voicing these things out to realize what a silly trick my brain was playing on me.